Declined to purchase new beauty cap. Got in car, turned engine on, was startled to find I'd suddenly shrunk to such a midget that my feet weren't long enough to reach the pedals anymore. Recalled with the usual irritation that all people who get paid to work on cars are six-foot-tall males who inevitably adjust the seat way back. Turned engine off and began search for seat-positioning lever. Successfully adjusted seat so I was tall enough to reach the pedals again. Drove home, feeling distinctly like Alice in Wonderland.
Asked MisterKrista on a date. Was told that this would be unfair to a mysterious Sacramentan rival, but that we could hang out for a non-date when she visits next month. Became terribly excited at the prospect of meeting her son, who goes by the name of Dragon Breath Kill Face Death Spider. Everyone's deepest secret desire is to meet someone named Dragon Breath Kill Face Death Spider. But found out she's not bringing Dragon Breath Kill Face Death Spider with her.
Took online test purporting to measure my political beliefs, as recommended by Jodawi. Learned that my so-called "political compass" is: Economic Left/Right: -6.50. Authoritarian/Libertarian: -7.90. Was delighted to find I had out-leftnessed and out-libertarianed Jodawi. Made proper fun of him for it. Decided to go brag about my scores to the rest of the world too. Typed this journal entry.
Pushed the "Post Entry" button.