April 21st, 2002


Family Visit and a Fragment of a Dream

Sometime last night I woke up and thought, "Oh, how interesting, I was having a dream and Morgan was in it and I remember now that thing I remembered during the dream was actually from a prior dream and this one was a sequel to it, but I never remembered the prior dream until I had the sequel . . ."

Then I went back to sleep, and now I can't remember anything at all about what the dreams were about except the above. So, I'm having a recurring dream sequence with Morgan in it but other than that I know absolutely nothing about it. It's weird how you can remember past dreams while you're dreaming but not when you're awake.

I went to see my parents yesterday. It was the first time I'd seen my dad and my brother in person since I came out to them in October. Since then, and my dad has gone and crippled himself by running too many marathons. Now he's hoping for knee surgery because otherwise he'll never be able to climb stairs or get up from chairs properly again. This is why I think exercise fanatacism is dumb. If you insist upon running 26 miles per day periodically year-round for 15 years, your legs go on strike and refuse to do anything at all anymore.

Anyway, I told my parents that I'm now officially actively seeking employment in New York. My mom said, "You should leave your furniture and your car here with us and just buy new ones over there to save transportation expenses, and then if you come back here a year later you can have them back." I said, "Obviously I have no intention of moving back and forth across the country every other year. Why on earth would you imagine that I'd want to do that?"

My parents have such extremely puzzling ideas.
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Unconventionally Complex Ways of Defining Sexual Preference

I had a brief but pleasant email exchange with Larry Kurdek this weekend while updating my links to the new location of The Multidimensional Scale of Sexuality which he co-authored, and would like to express my appreciation of it by recommending that you go read it and take it yourselves. I don't agree with its exclusion of everything people experienced under age 18 from consideration in its scoring, but that's an easy enough line to disregard and the rest is still very interesting. Personally, I score highest in the "Sequential Bisexual" category, but have also in the past (virtually by definition) scored high in both the "past heterosexual, currently homosexual" and the "past homosexual, currently heterosexual" categories. And back before I chose to be queer, I would have scored exclusively heterosexual.

The Klein Grid, invented by Fritz Klein (author of a book with the very queer-by-choice-inflected title The Bisexual Option), is another measurement system that takes into consideration far more complex experiences of sexual preference than are normally contemplated, and is also worth a look.