Dear Gayle/Cynthia of Queerchoice :)Goodness, this is certainly news. Now I'll have to write to Christine, who I loved and proposed marriage to repeatedly ftom ages 15 to 21, and inform her that this long-distance doctor has diagnosed her as a male! And my friend Renna, whom I asked out and was turned down by . . . she's male too! And Susan from my "Psychology of Homosexuality" class whom I was obsessed with in my senior year of college and wrote tragic unsent love poetry to after she got a different girlfriend . . . and Alberta from Southern California with whom I had an online relationship in the summer of 1999 and I wanted desperately to meet her until suddenly it all ended horribly when she suddenly turned religious and resolved to convert to heterosexuality . . . and Dlfke whom I invited to visit me only a very few short months ago and got no response from, but who would certainly have been more than welcome to have me instead of Jeremy if she'd accepted my invitation before I got around to asking him instead . . . THEY'RE ALL MALE!!!! Because this secret admirer of mine surely knows what ze's talking about in these matters, right? Though I must admit, this person was right in one instance: Libby, the president of my college's Queer Alliance, was a major love interest of mine for a couple of years in college and it did turn out tht Libby was actually a trannyboy . . . he's now happily partnered with another transman and going by the name of Ted. But wow: Christine, a transman too? All of them? That would definitely shock me.
Gayle, oh Gayle, oh how do you fail
To see the depth of your own flaws?
You rant and rave and even rail
But never you look at the cause
Frigid limbs are typing again
When Cynthia's on the prowl
I see this queerness you pretend
Is making people cry 'foul'
I also see a desperate plea
From someone quite straight and alone
Surrounded by friends who agree
And owning a house of glass, blown
I know it's true I see for you
The 'Net is a way to meet guys!
You found yourself a dick to screw
And made your virginity die
You accept women; true enough
But none were good enough for sex
Licking pussy and getting rough
Were never on your list for "next"
"Next" was to find a 'pretty' boy
Someone shallow and spineless too
Then you'd put away your sex-toys
And homosexuality views
You found your 'Joe' and status quo
Amongst gays, bis, and lesbians
Queerchoice is led by a hetero
Just finding a way to 'fit in'
Much love! Smooches, sweetheart! :-*
But then again, Jeremy's transgendered too, and back when in high school he even contemplated a complete sex change. So even if every woman I've ever loved has somehow turned into a man these days, I suppose I still can't very well lay claim to "heterosexuality" when the person I've been recently having sex with is quite adamantly not a man, and also (incidentally) possesses fingernails noticeably longer than I'm even biologically capable of growing mine out to, as well as hair quite as long as mine, and earrings (whereas I have none), and half a dozen makeup brushes (whereas I again have never owned any makeup brushes in my life) - and has also been occasionally known to go by the name of Miranda.
But wait! When I was in college, most of the members of the Queer Alliance knew me primarily by the name of Cyrus. So then: I am heterosexual after all!
Then again, that does mean that quite a few males I've loved must have turned into women somewhere along the way. Oh well, it could have happened - who am I to say?
Really though, it's astonishing how just one occasion of having sex with someone who only possesses the sex organs of one gender (eh, there aren't exactly a lot of un-surgically-"corrected" hermaphrodites to choose from these days, you know?) is automatically enough to somehow "prove" to some people that I'm somehow incapable of ever desiring anybody with any other type of sex organs. And you know, if I were some insecure het girl desperately trying to convince everybody I'm queer, do you have any idea how easy it would be to just go out and get laid by some random woman just to rack up the credentials which apparently hold great weight in the minds of stupid people? That I'm content to wait for the right moment with the right woman with whom I could actually fall in love is proof in itself that I know perfectly well who I am without having to engage in meaningless sex in a stupid attempt to "prove" anything.
But then, this person also accuses me of "putting away" my "homosexuality views" and lapsing into the "status quo." Oh yes, that's right! From my earliest childhood my parents' lifelong dream for me was that someday I'd grow up to run a nice conservative establishment like QueerByChoice.com and settle down with an upstanding transgendered queer boy with long blue-painted fingernails!