Everyone else: Don't mind us, we're just odd like that.
Welcome, friends, to the official Gayle Madwin Shoe Museum! Here you will be treated to a special guided tour of six pairs of shoes owned by the world's one and only Gayle Madwin. It should be noted that all six pairs of shoes were originally marketed as men's shoessize 9 in American men's shoe sizes. One of the goals of this display is to demonstrate (particularly to arsenothelys) that plenty of men's shoes go perfectly well with skirts and do not give an unfeminine impression in the least.
On display above, we have my current everyday pair of shoesthe only pair of shoes in this entire collection which I ever actually wear anymore, except for the purposes of museum display. The rest of the shoes in the collection have all formerly served as my everyday pair of shoes, but were retired for some reason I can no longer discern or remember, as they still appear to be perfectly good shoes. It's rather difficult for me to alternate between different shoes on different days though, because in order for me to wear any pair of shoes without crippling myself, I have to first tape a double layer of extra arch supports into each of them. I do not own enough arch support inserts to tape them into every pair of shoes I own.
Here we have a pair of shoes I quite adored. I adore all shoes with buckles on them. Unfortunately they're often difficult to find.
In the photograph above I'm wearing men's socks in addition to men's shoes. Men's socks are exceedingly stupid and colorless and boring, so I generally strive to avoid them. Unfortunately, women's socks do not really feet my feet quite so well as men's. My mother, whose feet are half a size larger than mine, always wears exclusively both men's socks and men's shoes because they fit better. But I have more effeminate tastes than her, and with my half a size smaller feet I can mostly get away with wearing women's socks. Alternatively, I suppose I could just buy a lot of plain white men's socks and a lot of brightly colored fabric dyes, and make men's socks turn interesting-looking.
On display here you find my bare sexy feet nearly entirely exposed! Foot fetishists, you may now commence salivating. (compound, that means you.)
The color is a little off in the photograph above; those are lavender socks I'm wearing and the skirt is the lovely lavender circle skirt I created myself from a tablecloth some eight or nine months ago (also depicted on my LJ userinfo page).
Here is my sixth and final pair of shoes. The astute among you will have observed that not one pair of shoes in my entire collection possesses shoelaces. (The decorative bow things don't count because there are no eyelets; the bow is just glued to the top of the shoe.) This is because in matters of appearance and time-consuming tasks to be undertaken before leaving for work in the morning, I am so absolutely exceedingly lazy that I don't even have adequate words to express it.
Please also take note that my legs have not been shaved since 1994 at the very latest. Not once. This is a point of particular pride.
Thank you for visiting The Gayle Madwin Shoe Museum!