Gayle Madwin (queerbychoice) wrote,
Gayle Madwin
queerbychoice

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But You Never Really Lived a Life Without Her

When I was a teenager, back when Christine and I were still best friends, there was a local up-and-coming Sacramento band called Cause & Effect which seemd like it had a chance of becoming internationally famous. Their biggest hit that was played on the local radio stations constantly was called "You Think You Know Her." Soon thereafter, one of the band's two members suddenly died of asthma, and his death pretty much decimated all the hopes. I think the remaining band member has made some efforts to carry on the band's name, but no one pays attention anymore.

Anyway, I bought their album back when the band still had two living members, and that song "You Think You Know Her" often comes to mind when I think about Christine.
You think you know her,
but you never really
lived a life without her.
You couldn't tell me
the things she said,
the books she read,
the way she looked
when the morning came.
The time of night
that you held her tight.
But you'll never forget
the day she ran away.
Of course, I could tell you the things she said and the books she read, and the reason I couldn't tell you the way she looked when the morning came is that I was never allowed to hold her tight at any time of night. But it's true that I never really lived a life without her. My life never really began until the day I met her, the first day of school in seventh grade - I was 12 years old, she was 11 because she had skipped kindergarten - and I never will really live a life without her, because she's here in my head every single day and she always will be.
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