You have been selected to participate in a survey whose findings will directly influence what you see on television in the future. . . . You have been selected to help represent the television viewing preferences of the entire country. . . . You do something almost everyone does at one time or another - watch TV.
I'm almost tempted to actually show up to the mass surveying event they sent me tickets to, just to explain to them that the only thing that might get me to turn on my television once or twice within the next five years would be if they put on a program all about the importance of encouraging everybody to convert to queerness. But it seems that they intend to make the people who show up to the event actually watch television while there, so, really, no thanks. Perhaps I should just send them a written reply: "Your letter seems to have been delivered to the wrong address. I am not a televiewer. (Since when has that even been a word, anyway? It sounds like some sort of mechanical screen-projection device.) My television barely gets four channels, and all four of them are staticky, and I haven't turned it on even once since last spring, unless you count the two seconds to check whether I'd plugged it in right. And as for 'representing the television viewing preferences of the entire country,' well, it's hard to imagine how anyone could be any less representative."
Unrelatedly, today's Ted Rall cartoon makes its point unusually well.